"Many people feel they get happiness from shopping and buying. Try a different "-ing" for happiness. Traveling, experiencing, and giving are just a few that come to mind." -Brian Walt

Happiness is contagious! If you're around happy people, you may become happy yourself. That's the danger of spending time with positive people. When you're feeling frustrated or angry, get to the closest happy person you know & start talking to him or her. Build your personal sense of well being and you'll begin to bounce back sooner than later. While this is like putting a little band-aid on a big boo-boo, it's not a permanent fix. True happiness can only from within yourself.

What would you tell your child about making good decisions? How would you suggest that he think about his choices and make the best decision? These are the most important questions any father can ask himself. One major responsibility of a father is to teach good decision making skills to his children. Unfortunately it's one that is unintentionally overlooked. Helping children learn to think about and make good decisions is one of the most important gifts a father can give. Here are some real world tools to help Dad (or Mom) on this journey:

·      Teach by example. Model your own best decision making skills where you children can watch and learn. For example, if you are in the mall and want something but don't buy it, visit with them about your decision and why you chose not to buy. "I would love these golf clubs, but I know we need to pay for Samantha's braces right now. Maybe I can think about getting them after her braces are off."

·      Start them off with a few options. When you're giving your children a choice, only give them a couple of options. "For dinner tomorrow night, would you rather have ravioli or tacos?" Successful decisions where the choices are limited (and you aren't too concerned with the outcome) will help children develop confidence in their decision making skills.

·      Don't solve their problems. Too often, fathers want to be in the "fix it" mode and try to solve problems for their children. Rather than making a decision for your children, help them make it themselves. And then don't jump so quickly to rescue them when things go wrong if they do. Even if they can't overcome the challenge with their decision making skills yet, praise them for trying when you can.

·      Be there! When the children are younger, be around them enough that you can help them think things through before they make a decision. Talking your children through the process before is a lot easier than helping them repair a mistake later.

Taking the time to walk your children through the process of making a decision will help them learn the best way to decide. Remember, they'll learn more from a little trial and error than they will if you make every decision for them. Having strong problem solving and decision making skills will help your children learn what they need to be strong decision makers in their adult life.

1.     Cut out the soda! Every time you were about to reach for a soft drink; replace it with water or tea.

2.     Add 1 to 5 minutes a day to your exercise routine. Should you not have a schedule in place, start with 5 minutes a day.

a.     When you get out of bed each morning do 5 sit-ups and 5 push-ups. Commit to doing this and you've just added 3,650 repetitions to your exercise routine every year!

3.     Get at least 8 hours of sleep for 3-4 nights a week (or more). When you're sleep deprived the health cost is enormous.

4.     Instead of trying to find a parking spot so close to the grocery store, park farther away. You'll get a little more walking exercise and a little more sunshine.

5.     When planning your meals pledge to eat at least 1 serving of vegetables with lunch and dinner. Plus, add in healthy fruits as snacks!

I know I called these health "tips", but now change the wording to health "rules" and promise to never break them. The healthier you are... the happier you'll be!

A National Football League game has an average of 65 offensive plays per game. Each play lasts 5 1/2 seconds. When you do the math, the average player is actually moving and playing the game for about 6 minutes. This may not seem like much time when you consider the average NFL player makes around $1.4 million. How much time do you think he spends practicing for those 6 minutes? During the season most players practice and study an average of 50 to 60 hours per week. Keep in mind an NFL player wasn't an accountant yesterday, then woke up today and said "hey I want to play professional football." These men have been practicing since pee-wee football! After all of that work they're still not guaranteed to win on Sunday!

Happiness, just like any sport requires practice! Certain people poses a natural ability at certain sports, but they still have to practice. The same goes for happiness! Some people are naturally happier than others, but we all need to practice. Being happy is not a right or a state of being that just happens. You must actively engage in activities and thoughts that make you happier. Here are some valuable points you can start to practice every day.

• Change the words you use in conversation and in your own head. Instead of saying "I hate sitting in traffic, this sucks", remind yourself that now you get to listen to your favorite music longer. Say to yourself "it's great to have some alone time" or "peace and quiet at last"! Practice using more positive words everyday and you'll find yourself in a better mood.
• What are you passionate about? When you're at the same job for 5 or 10 years, it might be tough to remain energetic about work. Why did you start that career path? There was something about the job and it felt good inside. You took your job with enthusiasm. Get back to the reason why you started there and challenge yourself to do even better. When you truly can't find any more passion from your career, then it's time to look elsewhere for a salary.
• Have you ever felt there's not enough time in the day? Plan your time and don't just let it get away from you. At the start of your day keep in mind what you need to get accomplished. Estimate how long each task should take. Plan time for distractions and interruptions, because you know they're going to happen anyway. Most importantly, plan some time throughout the day for yourself.

Life has many highs and lows, so expect your level of happiness to be different each day. Have realistic goals for your days, months, and years, but always keep them in sight. You're practicing the skill of happiness in order to have a better life! So keep it up and each positive day will add up to a happier existence!

Are you comfortable or are you complacent? Before you decide on which "C" category you fall into, take a look at their definitions from Dictionary.com:

·    Comfortable: being in a state of physical or mental comfort; contented and undisturbed; at ease.

·    Complacent: pleased, esp. with oneself or one's merits, advantages, situation, etc., often without awareness of some potential danger or defect; self-satisfied.

If you had to choose one or other (not both), which would it be? I know they both look fine, but neither one is really good for longer than a brief moment in life. If you want to achieve your dreams, get off your ass and do it! If you lived the rest of your life only feeling comfortable or complacent you would be missing out on excitement, stimulation, love, passion, pleasure, and even sadness. Yes, you also need some struggle and sorrow in life. Without them how would you know what happiness looks like?

Take notice when you're feeling comfortable or complacent and enjoy the moment. Just be sure you don't find yourself there too long or YOUR life is going to pass you by.

Have you ever said to someone else, "I need a change in life"? If you haven't admitted it to the person next to you, then I guarantee you're said it to yourself. Great! We agree you would like to make some changes in life... now what? First there's usually some experience or genuine shift in awareness and understanding (that "ah-ha" moment of how we arrived at this place in life). This could be a relationship, lifestyle, physical health, emotional health, finances, career, etc.

While you ponder this new experience, also keep this in mind, "perception is reality." To expand on that: your perception is your reality and Mary's perception is her reality. Genuinely making the effort to see things from someone else's perspective is the beginning of the change you're looking for. Oh, of course the other aspect is the honest acknowledgement of what you need to do differently and how it needs to be accomplished. Don't waste any time beating yourself up for not having this realization sooner, just get ready to move forward!

Here's a classic example of what I mean by this: I'm now aware I simply eat too much food and/or the wrong types of food. I'm acknowledging that I need to change right now, I've created this problem for myself and I'm the only person who can fix the situation. The consequences for not changing my eating habits would mean continuing to be overweight (fat); feeling frustrated about the way I look and feel and certainly moving myself closer to a health condition like diabetes and a heart attack.

This process works for any area of life when you need a change. Career, family, health, relationships, goals and your overall happiness will move in the right direction as soon as you take action with your new realization.

How can some people make a mistake year after year and then when they get caught, all of a sudden they realize that it was wrong? It's certainly quite convenient to admit their wrongdoings with such powerful apologies and promises to change! But pay close attention here... this is called bad behavior! When he or she knows not to do something, but does it anyway, this no longer falls under the mistake category. This is intentional and that person is just pissed about getting caught!

The skill of accountability is a tough one to master. Often it requires you to swallow your pride and other times it may make you feel uncomfortable for a moment. I guarantee it's worth it in the long run!

What would you do if a new customer called your business and wanted to buy your product of service? I hope your thinking, "well of course I would call him immediately and make the sale." Maybe you have a couple of pressing items you're in the middle of and then you'll return the call. Naturally, one of your employees has an emergency you must tend to, so now the new customer has to wait a little longer to give you his money. Before you know it the day is almost over and the sale will have to wait until tomorrow morning.

I understand "things" just happen, but there's no excuse for not calling back someone who wants to buy whatever it is you're selling. Now you finally get around to contacting him the next morning and you're too late! Your competitor sealed the deal yesterday.

I was calling around to some local karate schools for my older son the other morning; five schools to be exact. Within a couple of hours I received my first call back and scheduled a trail session for the following day. I was planning on trying two different schools in order to find a good fit for my son, but would you believe not one other karate person called me back? Luckily we really liked the one that did call me and signed with them.

Businesses spend thousands (if not hundreds of thousands) of dollars to attract new customers. When an unsolicited caller wants to know more about what you do, forget every excuse that comes up and get yourself a loyal customer. If you're not the first getting back to him, you're losing money. While it seems common sense to do this, apparently it's not so common as I thought.

"Focus on what you want & you'll get it. If you're not getting it, then you're not focusing hard enough!"

-Brian Walt